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MoviePass? Pass! < That was lame but you get it.

MoviePass started as a Holy Grail for movie lovers. Unlimited movies at $10 a month seemed too good to be true, cause it was. But only it wasn’t, for a little while. If I was MoviePass’s CEO I’d say “Let the ship go down with dignity!” and just let the company sink into debt as cinefiles in Cali and NY bled us dry, but I think they have shareholders and stuff so that can’t happen.

This part’s cliche but it’s important so don’t report me for plagiarizing you bum. MoviePass thought they’d be like a gym where you sign up and pay but never actually go, hahahahaha, dummies. People saw MoviePass with the mentality that if you have a show a day and don’t actually use it, you’re wasting money. That, and it’s easier to go sit in a theater than do crunches.

The Twittersphere lit up when people couldn’t get tickets to the movies they wanted. Some were surprised, but most of it was just sadness; people knew it was coming, and wanted to cherish the little bit of it they had left.

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This new systems of $9.95 a month for 3 movies seems a little insulting. It’s not, I get it. That’s what needs to be done to keep the company alive, but it’s really hard to roll back a subscription like that. You can’t go from eating at Olive Garden to eating at McDonalds (I grew up in a small town; Olive Garden was fancy so quit the judgement).

The worst news is that AMC’s A-List service is gaining subscribers while MoviePass is losing views. The jockeys have chosen their new saddles, and it is MoviePass’ competitors. When you’re saddling a horse, if you don’t properly cinch the girth you will fall off.

Read more shitty articles and watch this video.

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